The first thing that you want to do when you join another popular sex dating site is think that this time things are going to be different. You’ve finally found the site that’s going to turn everything around. By this time next month you’ll have so many dates that you’ll be booking women for three weeks in advance. You get online, make a great profile, and then start sending out a bunch of messages that never get any responses. What gives? Well, if you’re saying one of these six things then you’re shooting yourself in the foot before she even reads your profile.
Let’s Get Married, Jk
You’re on a dating site. There’s romance in the air, and a lot of tension goes into writing a first message. You want to flatter her and break the ice with a joke. Why not say something like, “You’re so beautiful, let’s get married! Haha, jk that would be weird. How about a first date instead?” You may find it cute and funny, but to a woman that sets off a major red flag. It’s way too soon to even be mentioning marriage in a joke. What seems harmless to you is going to send most ladies running for the hills before she even really gets a good look at you. Skip this and open with a less intense joke and you’ll find women are a lot more willing to engage with you.
Specifics about Your Junk
It’s a comment about online dating that this even has to be said, but. Guys, come on. Treat your dick with a little respect, here. Don’t just send a description to every woman in a fifty mile radius. A lot of sites have rules against unsolicited dick pics, and when they don’t have them things tend to get really uncomfortable for women really fast. Generally, there should be a lead up to sexting. “Surprise sexting” isn’t a great way to get women. Even if she would have been into you, a lot of women hate it when men assume that they’re available for sexting.
The Specifics of the Date You’re Planning
“Hello, for our date I was thinking that I could take you to…” and so forth. Even if you’ve put together a great date that features all the things that she says that she likes in her profile, plotting the date before you even say hello to her is going to be seen as a little creepy. A popular sex dating site has a lot of men vying for not as many women (especially on sites like BeNaughty.co.uk), so she’s not going to want to waste her time on a guy who just presumes that she’s going to go out with him. It can seem presumptuous and rude to think that of course she’s going to go out with you. Humility is something women love; if you come across as arrogant then she’s not going to be as interested in going out with you. It’s also true that a lot of modern women would find it not only arrogant but sexist to assume that she’s going to accept and plan a whole date without her permission.
If you want to get a better result for this, you need a plan. For your first message, include a lot of just general talking, and ask her a few questions about her hobbies. Keep it light, and keep it brief. At the end, you can add a casual, one line invitation. If she lists a favorite hobby or a favorite restaurant that interests you, say that you like the idea of it and you’re going to give it a try soon. It would be nice to have a teacher/have someone who’s been there before, but make it clear that it’s just a thought. You intend to do it whether she comes along with you or not. That’s a great way to invite her without seeming like you’re too eager for her to go.
That You’re a Nice Guy
If someone walked up to you on the street and said he was really generous, would you believe him? Women experience the same sense of uncomfortable disbelief when a man tells them he’s a “nice guy” right away. Unfortunately for the real nice guys, there are a bunch of men who have made that phrase synonymous with “women have hurt me and I’m bitter about it.” Women are wary about any guy who reminds them of these guys. They don’t have the time to invest in a guy who’s still sulking about his last break up. If you want her to know that you’re really nice, you should try giving her a bunch of compliments and showing an interest in her hobbies and goals. She’ll realize what a considerate man you are in just a couple messages. Relax, sit back, and let your natural charm do your work for you.
Your Long Term Romance Plans
Nothing puts too much pressure on a first message like letting her know that you want a wife and kids by the time you’re 35. Sure, you might feel like you’re running out of time to get everything you want out of life. You have timetable and you want everyone to stick with it. But telling her in the very first message that you want a wife pronto isn’t being honest and upfront with her. It’s being really demanding. Even if she does want to be a wife and mother soon, why should she tell that to this random guy who just messaged her online? She doesn’t want to rush into things with a man she met online. There are still a lot of men out there who use romance scams to get what they want. Most women try to avoid them by steering clear of tacky websites like BeNaughty.co.uk. However, if you plunk all your romantic hopes and dreams down in her lap you can’t be surprised when she gets a little bit put off and doesn’t want to talk to you again.
How Much Money You Make
If you slip in your income to a first message, you’re only going to get gold diggers and women who aren’t offended by being thought of as gold diggers. You might think of it as just another way to attract a hot woman’s attention, but it’s a really crude move. You might as well ask her how much for the night. If that’s not what she does for a living, you’d be better off talking about your most boring hobby. There’s just no world in which a good, fun lady who just wants to meet a nice man is going to enjoy being told upfront how much money you make.
Avoid these major first message pitfalls and you’ll be leaps ahead of lots of men on a surprisingly popular sex dating site who haven’t gotten these memos yet. You’ll have a much nicer time when you relax and focus on chit chat rather than trying to impress her right off the bat. Most of these mistakes come from wanting to impress her so badly. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Work on your confidence and you’ll find that women are eager to go out with you.
Furthermore, don’t forget to check our site test and read the review. Avoid scam dating sites at all cost and work on your messaging skills.